Pool Party
by RossoNeroFamiglia
Summary: Tornado warning during a pool party? What will Shin, Seto, and Crow do about this? Rated T for safety
1. Summer Fun

Story: Pool Party

Warnings: AU. Horrible References,some mature themes, and the decline of literate speech and writing as the story progresses

Like all the stories we will upload on FF, this is a collab, the theme is crack. So is the plot line.

Disclaimer: We do not own anything, for if we did, we would not be writing Fanfictions.

* * *

_Hot._ That was all Shin could think of as he peered up at the sky. It was soft blue with scattered clouds. Powder Pants could feel a vibration in his left pocket. He groped around and was finally able to pull the bulky device out of his pants. Flipping it open, he saw he received a message from an annoying birdbot.

_'WH3R3 AR3 U? U W3R3 5UPP053D 2 B H3R3 15 M1N AG0! D:'_' Shin cringed at his friends lack of literacy and decoded his hideous texting style. Quickly replying, powder pants closed the cellphone and put it back in his pocket.

The slight breeze ruffled Seto's hair as he made his way to his awaiting company. The red haired boy has been looking forward to swimming all week, but never found the opportunity because he was so busy with his summer job. Peering at the grass and wonderful weather, Seto just knew today was going to be a great day!

Cool air was all Crow could feel as he sat in the air conditioned lobby of his hotel building. He was irritated; both his buds were nearly half an hour late. The cell phone in his hands was being pounded on furiously as he texted his friends to get the hell over there sooner. After he received no responses from neither of his friends for a good 30 seconds, he shut his phone and threw his head back. _They sure take their goddamn time! _He supposed he thought to soon as he saw a professor looking man walk through the door.

"Crow," the man spoke softly and kindly towards him. " are you still expecting company?"

"Hell yeah," Crow responded a bit rudely "they're taking forever to get here!"

The man smiled, ignoring Crow's disrespect as if he was used to it. "I'm going out, are you going to be okay here by yourself until your friends arrive?"

"Tch, I suppose." Adjusting his hat, he looked to the side. "If I don't kill myself because of boredom that is."

His face may have shown a slight horrified expression, seeing as a lot of the time Crow would say things like that and be completely serious. He noticed Crow rolling his eyes as he resumed his spot on the sofa and began flipping through some magazines. A little hesitant at first, the man thought about maybe staying. But as quick as the thought came, it was gone. He trusted Crow enough to know that he wouldn't do something like that.

"I'll be back later, don't break anything."

"I won't make any promises!" Crow smirked and waved after the man. _Teasing that guy is so fun. _Picking up his cellphone, Crow looked at the time and only 5 minutes passed. He sighed, he will kill his friends when they arrive.

* * *

We love reviews, but if you decide to flame we will just ignore you. Constructive Criticism is welcome, but this is not our greatest work and we wrote it for humor purposes, so perfect literature would not be expected.

We hope you enjoy this collab and get a few good laughs from it.


	2. Reunion

Disclaimer: We own nothing

* * *

Seto was the first to appear. "Crow!"

Crow looked up from his cellphone. His face lit up when he saw Seto. Hurriedly getting up, he rushed over to his friend and gave him a big hug. "You're finally here! Took you long enough! Now to just wait for Mr. Powder Pants."

"You're not reading adult magazines again, are you...?"

"...A-And what If I am?" Crow said defensively.

"Why read those things when you have me?" Seto asked, almost seductively. _Almost._

Crow leaned in close to Seto s ear and whispered, "It gives me ideas for when I do have you~"

"Crow..." the small boy whispered back. "... I can see your boogers."

"...W-what? Seriously!" Crow stepped back and quickly wiped his nose in embarrassment.

It was at that point that Mr. Powder Pants decided to show his face. He lazily walked in and neatly seated himself on the couch, but not before giving a disgusted look to the magazines Crow left there.

Seto asked Crow, "So, when are we going to this pool you were talking about? I brought my swimsuit and everything!" The red haired boy really needed a nice relaxing time in a pool.

Crow chuckled. "Yup! There's one here at the hotel and hardly anyone uses it."

"Ehhh, I wonder why. If I had a pool where I lived I'd be in it all the time!"

Crow sighed and put his hands up," People here tend to be elderly."

"Oh..they just tend to be elderly."

"Haha, shut up smart ass before I have to make you."

"Isn't someone getting cocky," Shin interjected into the conversation.

Shit happens. They get to a pool. And then the plot starts happening.

Crow turned on the small TV situated on the wall in the left corner of the pool area. There was a high screeching noise coming from it and words flashing on and off. It read Tornado Warning in the following areas: Crow skimmed the list of cities and was shocked to see the name of one they were occupying at that very moment. The Warning will continue until 7:56pm Crow looked at his watch and read 4:35pm. The TV warned that they stay in low areas and avoid electricity and large masses of water.

* * *

** minty shoelace for Remi  
**


	3. Basement House

"We're all gonna die!" Seto screamed. He held his head in panic and cried. Shin frowned, feeling a headache forming at his friends idiocy.

"It's only a warning, not a real tornado," he sighed and turned to Crow. "Maybe we should go inside."

Crow had a worried face and turned his head to Shin, "Shouldn't we try to gather things up to prepare for the tornado? "

"It's not a real tornado! "

"But what if it really does happen?" Seto shrieked. He hurried out of the pool and put his socks on. "I don't want the tornado to hit my feet!"

"Your feet aren't going to be the only thing in trouble when it hits Seto! " Crow yelled as he gathered his things.

"My ears too?"

Shin rubbed his temples and tried to remember why the hell he was friends with these people anyway. He went inside, seeing as he wasn't in the pool in the first place to join up with the other two. Seto got out his Nintendo DS and put it on the charger.

"What are you doing Seto?"

"I'm charging it in case the power goes off, than I have something to do."

"GOOD IDEA." Crow got out his iPod and DS and did the same thing. "Where is the safest place in the building, Crow?" Seto asked as he crouched by his electronics. "I don't know Seto. But I know what we should do in these situations."

"What?"

"Ask yourself, 'What would Jesus do?" Crow took his religion seriously. Ever since the day he was baptized. MHM.

Seto stared at Crow in awe, his friend was so wise! He knew Crow was going places in life. He was just so smart. "I think Jesus would prevent the tornado from happening, by standing in front of it and asking the LORD to divert it elsewhere (most likely to the casting studio of the Da Vinci Code)"

Shin slapped Crow's preacher shit to the floor. "God can't help us now..."

"God can always help us! I'M PALS WITH HIM YOU KNOW!"

"Bullshit!" Shin shoved birdbot into his fridge. "If you were pals with God then we wouldn't even have to worry about a tornado."

"Everything that happens, God has a reason!"

"Shut up, Crow! God doesn't exist anyway. He's just like Santa Claus."

Seto let out a cry. "Santa doesn't exist?"

"No, and neither does Billy Mays. They're all myths." "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, MY OXY CLEAN! AND HERCULES UH...HOOKS." Seto jumped in the pool.

Crow growled and glared at Shin. "See! You see what you did? You ruined Seto's childhood innocence..."

"I doubt Oxy Clean had anything to do with his childhood."

" OXY CLEAN WAS MY LIFE. IT WAS BFFLS WITH ME WHEN I WAS LONELY IN THE WORLD! BECAUSE SOMEONE KILLED EVERYONE." Shin ignored Seto's babbling. The boy had been annoying him for weeks about a recurring dream he kept having that everyone was dead and he was the cause.

After all the electronics were done charging, they headed out of the pool area and proceeded to walk to Seto's basement.

" Seto... why do you own a basement here?" Crow asked, not remembering the place that seemed to have suddenly appeared on the side of his hotel. _What. Basement on the side of a hotel._ Crow thought as he saw the small building on the side, like it was dipping sauce and his hotel was the chips. He would hope his hotel was Tortitos. Those things hit the spot. And the dip being cheese. _Mmmm..._

"I thought I could use it for storage," Seto replied, ripping Crow from his Mexican chip fantasy.

"What on earth could you possibly have to store to take up a whole basement? Actually, it's more like a warehouse..." Shin stared.

"Dude, it's more like a house. He has a sofa in here and a TV for christ sake. And is that a mini-fridge?"

"...aw..guys..you caught me..I live here."

* * *

**minty shoelace for Remi.**


	4. Don't Kill us Santa

"..." Powder Pants was at a loss for words. How did everyone miss a fucking house?

"...so...you've been living next to me this whole time in a building I never noticed." Crow said in disbelief.

"Yes.. that's why I used to walk to school with you a lot," Seto frowned, a bit sad. "You did not notice me since I was the dork and you were the jock."

Shin shrugged. He's seen weirder shit happen, like when he caught a giant squid and it introduced his self as 'Steve'. He wanted to keep Steve, but his girlfriend, Sai, threatened to call PETA on him for not buying Steve apple juice when he asked for it. Shin hated apple juice. There was always too much juice and not enough apple.

Crow looked sad for a few minutes. "Oh, sorry man."

"It's okay! We're friends now and thats all that matters!" Seto gave Crow a reassuring smile.

They walked down Seto's steps into the cold damp basement. "I don't have a TV down here, but I have a radio. I think it should do 'till the tornado warning is over."

Crow reached over and grabbed 3 flashlights. "Good thing you have a bunch of...hurricane relief items? Man..we're in the middle of the continent and not near any oceans."

"I felt like they prepared for hurricanes the best, so I bought the kit for it."

Shin sat down on one of the old chairs Seto had. "... this place is disgusting," he stated plainly.

"Good job, captain obvious. You gonna tell me about how the grass is green now?" Crow asked sarcastically.

"Well.. the grass is green because the sun reflects the pigmentation off of the chloroplasts in the leaves, if you were that curious."

"Mr. Smarty Pants~" Seto teased as he changed into his pajamas and hugged a pillow. "I thought it would be less stressful if we had a slumber party,"

There was a small 'boom!' before the room was basked in complete darkness. The trio was quiet; save for a meep that came from Seto. The silence continued for a full minute enabling them to hear the storm outside. It was when another clap of thunder startled the poor shota boy before a word was said.

"Crow..." Seto called his friend out meekly. "... is God pissed at us?"

"...Yes, Seto. I believe he is. And it's all Shin's fault!" Crow responded, accusingly pointing a finger in Shin's general direction. It was meaningless, though, seeing as it was pitch black and no one could see a thing.

"What?" Shin stood up. "How the hell is it my fault? I didn't do anything!"

"You doubted God's existence and now he seeks revenge!" Crow grabbed Seto's pillow (or what he thought was his pillow) and threw it at Shin.

"Why Shin, why?"

"I didn't- gah!" Shin didn't get a chance to finish his sentence as he was interrupted by a pillow smacking into his face. He kicked it out of the way angrily and hissed as Seto shined his flashlight into his eyes.

"Ouch! Quit that!" Seto diverted the light to Crow who sat there, obviously unhappy. A strong wind blew making the house creek, and the rain got louder as the storm went on.

"Oh no!" Seto cried. "I think God just growled! What do we do, Crow?"

"We should pray!" Crow suggested. Seto got on all fours and crawled closer to his birdy friend, a glimmer of hope settling in his eyes. He knelt and clasped his hands together, looking up to the ceiling.

"God... " he started. "Please don't kill us!"

Silence filled the room again. Nothing happened, the storm just seemed to get worse.

"See, I told you he doesn't exist," Shin stated, plopping down on the floor and crossing his arms like a four year old (though no one could see). "If he did, he would have done something a long time ago."

"W- wait, maybe I did it wrong," Seto squeezed his eyes shut and tried again. "Santa Claus, please don't kill us!"

Crow hit Seto on the shoulder. "Stop kidding around and get serious!"

"I am serious!" he retorted. "If God is as important as you say he is, don't you think he wouldn't have time to mess with us? He probably sent Santa instead!"

"He is a busy man..." Crow scratched his chin in thought.

Shin let out an agitated sigh, "Can we just get over this? You guys are acting like retards."

"Of course, Shin wants us to die... you're a cruel guy, Shin." Crow gave powder pants a look, and Seto nodded in agreement.

"If you dieing means I don't have to listen to this then be my guest." Shotaboi gasped in disbelief. "Y- you don't really mean that, do you...?"

"How about we play some games to ignore the storm?" Crow changed the subject, not wanting Seto to get anymore upset then he already was. "Do you have any board games, Seto?"

"What a stupid idea. It's not like we'd be able to see what we're doing." Shin rolled his eyes at Crow's inability to think things through.

"Aww... you're right..." Crow sighed in defeat.

Seto remembered something. "I have a kerosene lamp upstairs. We could light that and play a board game!" Seto said excitedly. He leap up with a flashlight and slammed the basement door open. The darkness consumed the whole house. Seto searched the area, looking for his lamp.

SETO FLASHED HIS FLASHLIGHT ON A WALL AND THERE WAS BLOOD WRITING THAT SAID "HELP MEEEEEEE IIIIIIIIIII" "WAFFLES" was written under it in neon pink blood.

"Oh my god!" he cried. "there's blood on the wall!"


End file.
